Saturday, October 31, 2020

Conclusively by Fanny Howe


The night was almost too long to bear
Then there was evidence of mercy—a passing car—
milky air—and I could see
dry walls & gravel on the way to the highway
Atlantic for its grays
Loss is the fulfillment of the Law
Space collected on a long line
I was eliminated as a locus of mothering—
a she—physical but imaginary as a restless daughter
Why this body and not another
The one who came to destroy the works of women—their
knew how many people were resisting incarnation
He counted on them by accommodating them
Guilt relieving guilt
is the get of killers whose mouths shine
I can't say enough about this—red because sore
& polished because wet
One died to become the spirit-guide
Before that time
there were second persons in everything
Then saints, then no one
to guide anyone to heaven
Cosmic expansion has gone on in its preferred direction
I can hear the hour, this never
happened to me before
One day I will shake the blue sky from my hair
and slip back to consciousness—
the things that is always aware
with or without a living creature to share its pleasures
Tonight I request the precious gift of final perseverance
shored up in my sheets
not far from a predawn holocaust
of traveling children 

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