Sometimes My Feet Go Numb by Wayne Corbitt

Sometimes My Feet Go Numb

 

Sometimes my feet go numb

I sleep a lot

Most of my old fag buddies are dead

My doctor treated my lover too

I feel guilty about being alive.

 

Sometimes my feet go numb

In people of color the skin is ashy dry

Coffee and tea don’t go well with my medication

I remember sexual freedom.

 

Sometimes my feet go numb

It takes one or two days to get a prescription filled

   at San Francisco General

I heard two guys making a speed deal at the food bank once

My thumbnails are blue from AZT

Bruises that don’t heal quickly worry me.

 

Sometimes my feet go numb

My sweat smells medicinal, my urine stinks

Television commercials make me cry

The news makes me angry

I’m tired all the time.

 

Sometimes my feet go numb

I take an anti-depressant and other drugs

   to scare my voices away

I hate pity

The very idea of wearing diapers is humiliating

I wonder if the acupuncture is doing any good.

 

Sometimes my feet go numb

And I don’t notice until I try to walk

Then I stumble

   swear

Shake them awake

   and move on.